Men Behaving Godly

Sunday's message was directed at fathers, of course. Hopefully you felt challenged and encouraged to be the man/husband/father that God has designed and is calling you to be!

While the sermon was basically about men, it may have spoke to everyone--men and women alike, to take a look at your relationships and your family and see an area that you can work on. Beverly and I have been married for 38 years and have led marriage groups and taught marriage classes for many of those years, and I will tell you that I am still learning. I continue to be challenged as God shines the light in my heart and exposes attitudes and beliefs and thoughts that are not in keeping with His design for me. I'm still learning, folks!

Interestingly on the way home from church, as we discussed the sermon, Beverly and I began talking about the things that we have learned (and are still learning) in our years together. We both realize that we wish we "knew then what we know (or are learning) now" in terms of how to be the husband and wife/father and mother that God wants us to be. We talked about how the modeling we had as kids led us to wrong conclusions about what our roles would be in our family as adults.

What we learned by watching our parents in their roles as spouses and parents, set the course for our marriage. Oh, if we could only rewind which, of course, we can't. We can determine, through the grace of God, to change the things that He convicts us of, and we have seen changes happen over the past many years. We still have a long ways to go.

As I think about modeling, I would like to add a postscript to Sunday's message and that is this:

Fathers, your sons are learning from you what a godly father and husband looks like. Your sons are watching you in your interaction with your wife, and they are making mental notes about how to behave as husbands. If they see you yelling or being critical or angry, they will grow up thinking that that's the way that men treat women. They are also experiencing you as a father, and learning the way "it is supposed to be," right or wrong. Someday, when you look at your son in his own family, chances are pretty good you will see a reflection of who and what you are.

Fathers, you are also modeling for your daughters what a godly father and husband looks like. Your daughters are learning from you how a husband should treat his wife, and therefore, how she should "expect" to be treated by her future husband. If she sees you criticizing or being unkind or demanding with your wife, she will probably end up with someone who treats her the same way. If she marries someone like that, how good of a father will he be to your grandchildren? (If you don't believe me, ask Beverly how often that pattern occurs in her counseling practice.)

So when you consider Sunday's message and think and pray about making some positive changes, perhaps one thing to keep in mind is that you are creating the family climate for the generations that will come after you--your children and their children. You have the opportunity to give your children a great start for their own families, and you can start today!

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