Be Mindful

On Sunday we talked about some directives that Paul gave to the Thessalonian church.

I Thessalonians 5:14-15 "And we urge you, brothers, warn those who are idle, encourage the timid, help the weak, be patient with everyone. Make sure that nobody pays back wrong for wrong, but always try to be kind to each other and to everyone else."

So what is the context of that passage? In chapter 4, Paul gives instruction to the Church about holy living. He then launches into talking about the second coming of Jesus Christ. Immediately after that, in the sermon text, he gives the instructions to the church as to how they should conduct themselves, especially in their relationships with one another.

It appears that Paul thought that relationships within the body of Christ were important in the Church in dealing with the end times. We don't know exactly what his reasons were but I think it is safe to say that Paul believed that healthy, Godly relationships would be important to the unity of the Body, and that unity of the Body would be important in dealing with the end times and waiting for Christ's return. A theme that runs throughout Paul's writings is love and unity within the Church family.

So I would like to just reiterate some of the points of the sermon from Sunday. 1) Be mindful of family dynamics. 2) Be willing to bring loving correction as needed. 3) Be willing to spontaneously comfort those who are in need of it. 4) Be committed to godliness in your church community/family. 5) Forgiveness is the rule, which may involve overlooking offenses. 6) Be compassionate.

So how are you doing with all that? Are you willing to confront when necessary? Are you so committed to your church community/family that forgiveness is more of a priority than being right? Are you compassionate?

It is important to remember that we must look at our relationships here on earth with an eye towards eternity. If we do that, we will find ourselves behaving in the ways that Paul talked about:

1) Desire the best for your brothers and sisters in Christ. If you do that, then you will have that in mind in any conflict. It will not be about your pride or your need to win, it will be about what is best for the other person. "Be kindly affectionate to one another with brotherly love, in honor giving preference to one another."

2) Model godliness for your brothers and sisters in Christ. Are you setting an example of Godliness? Paul, in I Corinthians 11:1, wrote "Imitate me, just as I also imitate Christ." Can you say that with confidence to those around you?

3) Seek resolutions to conflict and don't add fuel to the fire. That kind of speaks for itself, doesn't it? Paul writes in Romans 12:18, "If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men."

4) Listen to the Lord in all your interactions with others. I Corinthians 2:13 says, "This is what we speak, not in words taught us by human wisdom but in words taught by the Spirit, expressing spiritual truths in spiritual words."

5) Focus on eternity in the lives of your brothers and sisters in Christ. II Corinthians 3:18 says, "And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord's glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit." You are reflecting something. Are you reflecting Christ, and are you helping (by your behavior) your brothers and sisters be transformed into Christ's likeness?

6) Have pure motivations in your dealings with others. This is an outcome of Point One (desiring the best). If you desire the best for them, then you will probably be much more likely to have pure motivations and not hidden agendas or selfish intentions.

7) Lovingly confront bad behavior. Love your brother and sister enough to correct them when they are off course. Is this easy? Not at all! But if we love others more than our comfort, we will confront them when they need it, because we want the best for them!

Tell me what you think! Relationships in church are such an important topic, I want to know your response to Sunday's sermon and to this post! Talk to me!

Men Behaving Godly

Sunday's message was directed at fathers, of course. Hopefully you felt challenged and encouraged to be the man/husband/father that God has designed and is calling you to be!

While the sermon was basically about men, it may have spoke to everyone--men and women alike, to take a look at your relationships and your family and see an area that you can work on. Beverly and I have been married for 38 years and have led marriage groups and taught marriage classes for many of those years, and I will tell you that I am still learning. I continue to be challenged as God shines the light in my heart and exposes attitudes and beliefs and thoughts that are not in keeping with His design for me. I'm still learning, folks!

Interestingly on the way home from church, as we discussed the sermon, Beverly and I began talking about the things that we have learned (and are still learning) in our years together. We both realize that we wish we "knew then what we know (or are learning) now" in terms of how to be the husband and wife/father and mother that God wants us to be. We talked about how the modeling we had as kids led us to wrong conclusions about what our roles would be in our family as adults.

What we learned by watching our parents in their roles as spouses and parents, set the course for our marriage. Oh, if we could only rewind which, of course, we can't. We can determine, through the grace of God, to change the things that He convicts us of, and we have seen changes happen over the past many years. We still have a long ways to go.

As I think about modeling, I would like to add a postscript to Sunday's message and that is this:

Fathers, your sons are learning from you what a godly father and husband looks like. Your sons are watching you in your interaction with your wife, and they are making mental notes about how to behave as husbands. If they see you yelling or being critical or angry, they will grow up thinking that that's the way that men treat women. They are also experiencing you as a father, and learning the way "it is supposed to be," right or wrong. Someday, when you look at your son in his own family, chances are pretty good you will see a reflection of who and what you are.

Fathers, you are also modeling for your daughters what a godly father and husband looks like. Your daughters are learning from you how a husband should treat his wife, and therefore, how she should "expect" to be treated by her future husband. If she sees you criticizing or being unkind or demanding with your wife, she will probably end up with someone who treats her the same way. If she marries someone like that, how good of a father will he be to your grandchildren? (If you don't believe me, ask Beverly how often that pattern occurs in her counseling practice.)

So when you consider Sunday's message and think and pray about making some positive changes, perhaps one thing to keep in mind is that you are creating the family climate for the generations that will come after you--your children and their children. You have the opportunity to give your children a great start for their own families, and you can start today!

Talk to me! Post a comment! I love to read them!

Being Respectful

On Sunday, we talked about being respectful in our relationships. I want to focus in today's post on our relationships within the body of Christ. Psalm 133:1 tells us "How good and pleasant it is when brothers live together in unity!" Hebrews 12:14 tells us "Make every effort to live at peace with all men and to be holy."

Living in unity and living at peace with all men seems like a tall order, doesn't it? I wonder what the church would be like if we all were actually in unity and were living at peace with all men. We certainly have been given the directive, but sometimes walking it out is a tough assignment. Why is that? Why are there "issues" that divide and cause rifts in relationships?

Well, of course the obvious answer is that we are people who have wants and desires and our own ideas of what is the right way to do any given thing. We have different giftings, and we have our passions and our visions that are different from others. Unfortunately, sometimes our wants and desires are contrary to those of others. When we are dealing with people who are inherently different from us we have to work hard at living at peace and in unity with them.

Different is the key word. People are different from us, but that doesn't make them wrong. The key to living in harmony is learning to appreciate those differences. Remember that every time you deal with a person who is different from you, it is an opportunity to learn something. When we can appreciate someone who is different from us, we can begin to see the strengths in their personality or viewpoint. Taking the time to listen to someone who sees a situation differently than you do is the first step towards unity.

It is my personal belief that one of the important things that God does in our relationships with fellow believers is that He brings to light things in us that need to change. That is, in part, one aspect of sanctification, specifically the process of becoming conformed to the image of Christ. As we walk with the Lord, we are to become more like Him. II Corinthians 3:18 says, "And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord's glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit."

So when we are at odds with someone in the body of Christ (or outside the body as well, however here I am focusing on Body Life), we should seek to resolve the issue in a way to be in unity as the psalmist wrote, but also to live at peace with that person as Paul instructed. Resolve the issue. Find a way to live at peace with him/her.

It is important to remember that we are not talking about simply putting on a happy face with a "grin and bear it" mentality. Inside many happy appearances reside heart issues that are only known to God and ourselves. It is those hidden heart issues that eventually come out and destroy relationships and, yes, even entire churches.

But even more importantly when we are struggling to accept a person or his/her views, we should ask God to show us what is in our hearts that needs to be changed. (Notice I didn't say to ask God what is in the other person's heart!) What is there in your heart that is contributing to the relationship issue you are dealing with? Bitterness? Pride? Unforgiveness? Selfishness? Anger? Resentment? Arrogance? Seek God, and then seek to rid yourselves of whatever it is that gets in the way of unity and peace in relationships.

If we all were to do that, if we were to look inward for the problem instead of pointing fingers at others, we would be well on our way to unity and peace, and the Church would be an example to the world in ways that can only testify of God's transforming power in our lives.

Ephesians 4:1 says, "Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love."

I Peter 2:17 says, "Show proper respect to everyone: Love the brotherhood of believers, fear God, honor the king."

Romans 12:10 says, "Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves."

The message is clear. We are to prefer the desires and needs of others over those of ourselves. Whenever we are insisting on our way or angry when we don't get it, we are clearly in violation of scripture and we have a heart issue to deal with.

Talk to me! Post a comment! I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Waiting and Watching

"When the next generation looks back on our lives, will they see servants of the Lord that have been faithfully watching, or will they see adults who were waiting for the Lord while passing time doing a thousand different things?"

I don't know about you, but that is a question that stops me short in my tracks. I have long said that one of the things that is most important to me is that when I am gone I leave "tracks" that my children and grandchildren can confidently follow in their quest to honor the Lord. I want them to be able to say that their dad (or grandpa or great-grandpa) honored God and served Him well.

I taught my boys to play baseball. We taught all three kids to drive a car. Beverly taught them to cook and do laundry. We helped them with their school work and we participated in their school events and extra-curricular activities. All good things.

But those things are not the things that really mattered in the scheme of things. We also taught them other things of more importance and value. Be a person of character. Tell the truth. Respect other people. Keep your word. Help people. Be kind. Treat people the way you would like to be treated.

The most important thing we taught them was about living with a view towards eternity. I suppose that could be called watchfulness.

Mental Watchfulness

I Thessalonians 5:6 tells us to be sober and alert. We taught our children to not be taken in by the enemy's tactics, but to watch out for those that would try to draw them away from their faith.

Being drawn away from our faith sometimes happens when we start running with the wrong crowd and start drinking or partying or whatever. But, unfortunately, most of the time it happens in a much more subtle way. We start THINKING like those outside of Christ. We start trying to FIT IN with their lifestyle and choices.

Red Flag Warning: If we start feeling like we fit in very well with our non-Christian friends in ways that do not honor Christ, we are not being "Mentally Watchful."

Moral Watchfulness

II Timothy lists some characteristics of people in the last days before Christ returns: 1) lovers of self, 2) lovers of money, 3) boastful, 4) arrogant, 5) revilers (verbally abusive), 6) being disobedient to parents, 7) ungrateful, 8) unholy, 9) unloving, 10) being gossipers, 11) having no self-control, 12) being brutal, 13) being haters of good, 14) treacherous, 15) reckless, 16) conceited, 17) lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God.

It is really quite a list, isn't it? I would imagine that most of us look at the list and think, "Well, that doesn't really describe me, so I'm safe." Really?

I would have to say that as a general rule I am not boastful or arrogant or ungrateful or unloving. But are there times when I boast? Or are there times when I am arrogant or ungrateful? Am I sometimes unloving? The answer to that is "yes."

But here's the thing: If I ask the Holy Spirit to convict me of any behaviors like those mentioned above, and if I REPENT and seek to CHANGE, then I am much less likely to exhibit those characteristics until they become who I am. If I am boastful often I am becoming a boaster. If I am ungrateful often, then I am becoming ungrateful. Repentance is the key, and a willingness to be changed by a work of the Spirit.

Red Flag Warning: If I notice a particular characteristic in my life that is becoming a pattern then I am probably losing my Moral Watchfulness. I will most likely only notice this pattern if I am listening to the Holy Spirit. I must repent repent and change, or I will be lulled into a pattern of ungodly attitudes and behaviors.

I Thessalonians 5:8-9 says "But since we belong to the day, let us be self-controlled, putting on faith and love as a breastplate, and the hope of salvation as a helmet. For God did not appoint us to suffer wrath but to receive salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ."

Proverbs 4:23 tells us "Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life."

As I mentioned on Sunday, it is often the LITTLE sins (not that God thinks they're little) that do the most damage in our lives. We must be watchful for any of those little things (bad attitudes, resentment, bitterness, etc.) creeping into our lives. The world considers those things "normal," but they must never be normal to us, because if we allow those things into our lives we are letting down our guard.

Talk to me. What are your thoughts? Which is the most difficult do you think, the MENTAL watchfulness or the MORAL watchfulness?

Write a comment! I'd love to read it!

The Holy Spirit Overcomes

Sunday we talked about overcoming through the power of the Holy Spirit. The apostle John writes that "every spirit that does not acknowledge Jesus is not from God. This is the spirit of the anti-Christ, which you have heard is coming and even now is already in the world. You dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the One who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world. They are from the world and, therefore, speak from the viewpoint of the world, and the world listens to them." (I John 4:3-5)

We, my friends, are overcomers through the power of the Holy Spirit within us. We must not fear the spirit of the anti-Christ, but we must instead resist it. "Resist the devil and he will flee from you." (James 4:7) How do we resist the enemy who is the spirit of the anti-Christ?

First, we must understand that we cannot do it in our own human strength. The apostle Paul writes about Christ's overcoming, decisive victory: "and having disarmed the powers and authorities, He made a public spectacle of them, triumphing over them by the cross. (Colossians 2:15) Remember, it is important for us to acknowledge our dependence upon the Holy Spirit for the power to overcome, walking through each day relying upon Him for strength and wisdom and discernment.

Second, we must know the truth. How? We must know the word of God. This does not mean, of course, that we must have the entire Bible memorized. But we need to study the word and absorb the word and apply the word each day, so that we find God's word central to all we say and do. It is essential for the word of God needs to be our compass and the truth of God's word the light that guides our path. "Your word is a lamp for my feet and a light for my path." (Psalm 119:105)


Finally, we must be aware of all the voices out there that are the spirit of the anti-Christ. We must never forget, friends, that the spirit of the anti-Christ often speaks to us in sweet, gentle tones that we find soothing and attractive. The spirit of the anti-Christ usually will weave in just enough truth in what is being said, that unless you are careful to know the word of God and to listen to the Holy Spirit within you, it is possible to be deceived. So while you must not fear, you must be vigilant and hold fast to the truth.

"Hold on to instruction, do not let it go; guard it well, for it is your life." (Proverbs 4:13)

"Be always on your guard and stand firm in the faith." (I Corinthians 16:13)

"Therefore, dear friends, since you already know this, be on your guard so that you may not be carried away by the error of lawless men and fall from your secure position." (II Peter 3:17)

"We must pay more careful attention, therefore, to what we have heard, so that we do not drift away." (Hebrews 2:1)

Questions to ponder:

1) Do you test the spirits by holding what you hear up to the word of God to determine whether it is of Christ or of the anti-Christ?

2) Do you listen carefully to see if what you are hearing is all true or if it has a bit of truth? Do you ask yourself if things line up with the word of God?

3) Do you feed on God's word, so that when the lie comes along you will recognize it?

4) Have philosophies and thinking of this world seeped into your worldview? If so, how has that happened and what will you do to correct it?

Talk to me! I love to read what you are thinking and see how the Sunday teaching challenges you.